Some "signature lines" from some posters on a biker forum I frequent....

"I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather,
Not screaming in terror like his passengers!"

"You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle aged woman: Stuff you pay good money for in later life."

"Always be kind to everyone you meet and have a plan to kill them, just in case."

"There are 10 types of people. Those who understand binary and those who don't."

"A word to the wise isn't necessary - it's the stupid ones who need advice."

"Some People Are Like Slinky's- Basically Useless, But Still Bring A Smile to Your Face When You Push Them Down A Flight Of Stairs."

"Life's tough, it's tougher when you're stupid."

" Neca eos omnes. Deus suos agnoscet."

"Due to the current financial situation the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off until further notice."

"Two wrongs don't make a right, but three lefts does."

"I didn't come here to be told I was burning the candle at both ends, I came for more wax. "

"What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? "Robin, get in the Batmobile.""

"Irony is not the act of homicide with a small domestic appliance."

"The very existence of flame-throwers proves that some time, somewhere, someone said to themselves, You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I'm just not close enough to get the job done."