Meet one of the (usually) nameless, faceless monitors who despoil our daily reverie with their ceaseless, nitpicking corrections of grammar and spelling.

A.K.A. - The grammar police.

Here's her story as told in the San Francisco Chronicle July 23, 2006.

As you read this magazine, Serena Bardell is reading it too, pencil in hand. Bardell is not a crossword puzzler. She is a dutiful representative of SPELL (the Society for the Preservation of the English Language and Literature). She makes note of grammatical errors in all articles, even ones about herself. Then she e-mails in corrections.

On becoming a grammarian

As far back as I can remember I loved diagramming sentences. I am persuaded that once we stopped diagramming sentences, there have been more errors. I mean more errors everywhere, whether it's the airplane, the space shuttle or the operating room.

On standards

Grammar is getting worse as we sit here. It isn't just grammar. It's usage and communication.

On an example

They put the modifier at the end of the sentence instead of next to what it is they're modifying, so you have to go back in your mind and say, "Oh. He wasn't shot through the hole in the barn, he was shot through the gut, or whatever." It's a dying art.

On rigidity

People garble the language, and I don't know why it bothers me so much. It's some sort of psychological quirk.

On corrections

SPELL provides something called "goof cards." They're cute and polite and have a little cartoon on them. I stopped using those when I got repetitive stress. I send e-mails, and I try always to explain what the error is, not just to be snippy and say, "Hey, jerk, got this wrong." That's one thing you can't do when you're speaking for an organization. You have to be courteous.

On the root of the problem

I only learned within the last year that they stopped teaching rules of grammar in the '60s. They taught people what to say but not why. No wonder why people make so many mistakes. They can't go back in their minds and say, "This is transitive, this is intransitive." It's the "lie, lay" thing.

On response

I got a call from some big-name byline guy from the New York Times. I had sent him a goof notice. It was "just desserts." A whole generation has come along thinking "he got his just desserts" is spelled just the way "dessert" after a dinner is spelled. It comes from deserve.

On quantity

If I had nothing else to do in my life, I could spend every day sending them. I probably send half a dozen a week.

On other things she has to do

I served on the San Francisco civil grand jury in the '96-'97 term. I fell in love with it as the ultimate small-league democracy sort of thing. I joined the alumni of statewide grand jury association, and in 2003 we started a local chapter here, and I got on the board and also got elected to the state board. It takes up an enormous amount of time, but I'm very interested in it.

On working at home

I live in Golden Gate Valley, which is the old name for Cow Hollow. This house was built in 1885, or at least that was when it first got its water connected.

On doing it the old way

I cook on a cooking porch at a 1930s Magic Chef Estate stove. The old Italian families didn't want the cooking odors going into the house. There's a cooler -- a cupboard with an opening to the outdoors.

On work hours

Left to my own devices, which I never am, I get up about 1 (p.m.). I go to sleep about 5:30 (a.m.).

These self important, holier-than-thou people tick me off.

If'n Ah wanna whhrit an' myk spekink an 'matical mestakyes, lemme!

The term ," Get a life " comes to mind.