A blind man and his seeing-eye dog enter a bar and make their way to the middle of the bar.
After ordering a drink the blind guy says to the bartender, “You like to hear a blonde joke?"
The bar immediately becomes so quite you could hear a pin drop.
In a low voice, the woman sitting next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, you should know some facts, the bartender is blonde, the bouncer is blonde, and I'm a 6' 2” tall, 210 lb. blonde with a black belt in karate.
Also, the woman sitting next to me is blonde and she's a female boxer. The lady to your right is a blonde, and she's a wrestler. Think about it for a minute, Dude. You still want to tell that joke?"
The blind guy says, "Nah, not if I'm going to have to explain it five times."

Foreign Words The English Language Needs

Have you ever blurted out, "Wow, that guy is just so...so..." and then were left floundering with nothing to say? Well, it's not always your fault. English doesn't have words for every situation, or even the ones that happen every damned day.

Backpfeifengesicht (German)

Means:

A face badly in need of a fist.

Some people, we just suspect deep down that the only way to get through to them is by violence. Or perhaps the violence is the only thing that will make us feel better.

It's the friend who insists on telling racist jokes in front of your mixed-race girlfriend, a co-worker who's constantly sniveling about minor grammar issues on your post-it memos or any number of entertainers you see on magazine covers.

Courtesy of Germany, this nameless horror is in fact named backpfeifengesicht, a face that cries out for a fist in it. Everyone knows at least one of these people. If you don't, it might be you.

There are variations that definition, that claim it merely means the face needs to be "slapped" but this is Germany we're talking about here. We're going with fist, and further ask if we can modify the word to mean "A face that needs a crowbar." Because there's really another category that needs addressed there.

Rod Blagojevich

Some good stuff from Marcus Brigstocke...

Religion (7;21)



At the Apollo Part 1 (8;54)



Apollo part 2 (9;50)

Ok, you've wasted enough time.... get on with your day.

Royal Enfield V-Twin - The Musket

What you see here is a 700cc Royal Enfield V-Twin constructed using two 350cc top ends. The whole bike appears to have come from the factory, or maybe the “special vehicle operations” section, instead of the mind and work of a creative and determined owner. Aniket Vardhan, the builder, still wants to come up with a better exhaust arrangement, than short open pipes, but already, the bike looks fantastic. Aniket calls the 700cc Enfield V twin, “The Musket”, to keep the vintage gun (ala Bullet) reference alive.

Aniket's rationale and idealism....

1. Keep it as ridiculously simple as the original Bullet engine. Therefore, no modern updates to major engine internals
, so it still has the stock tappets, no hydraulics, and the stock piston oil pumps
. Vintage bike lovers really like to tinker and tappet adjustment is almost a religous ritual for many.
2. Improve the oil filter - I machined a new filter housing which uses a standard modern cartridge type filter available at Advance. This is not a screw on car type filter - that doesn’t look right, so I have a finned aluminum housing I made.
3. Aesthetically, and this was very important to me being an industrial designer- keep the “vintage” and “Enfield” cues strong. I thought I would pick up from the last Enfield big twin- the Interceptor. The rounded profile of the front of the crankcase and pleasingly smooth and gently radiused forms of the castings and the cooling fins on the side of the wet sump. A wet sump simplifies matters and also ties in with the last Enfield big twin- the Interceptor Mark 2, which also had a wet sump.
4. I love the external copper oil pipes that are such beautiful visual elements on vintage engines, so I decided to incorporate that as well. This also helps to keep the oil cool as it travels through them, exposed to the air.
5. Keep the frame mods to a minimum and again keep the “vintage” feel going by keeping the single down tube- the Enfield big twins of yore had single down tube frames and handled well. The look of the “vintage V twin” I think is the very simple and elegantly “cradled” engine between two tubes- front sloping forward and rear sloping back.

This article is better enjoyed over where I first saw it, check The Kneeslider links below for the full story.

Original post Here.

An update Here.

Scarpar: Powersports for Board Riders (2;19)



Scarpar.com

Interesting that the company chose a name beginning with "scar".....

Hey Y'all.

Yes, It's been a while.

A recent death in the family and resultant trip home, atop work, on top of realizing I spend far too much time web surfing, have conspired to keep the blog silent for far too long.

My recent aquisition of a damn Iphone means I can webcrawl anywhere, which allowed me to realize just how much of my life I was spending behind my monitors, reading about others lives.

I also started my first home brew attempt, a copper ale derivative.

Plus, summer's here. Been motorcycling. Not much phototaking, just riding along enjoying the scenery for what it is, not always looking for that shot with an eye toward a blog post.

Also tied in with all this is the recent "Biggest Loser" competition among my co-workers. Sitting and blogging is not condusive to a healthy weight nor lifestyle, I'm using the contest as an initiative to get back to sensible eating and a spur to make me continue to hit the gym on a daily basis. I'm also fairly sure my recent back pain issues can be at least partially attributed to my poor posture hunched here in front of the keyboard.

So, for you, this means although I'll still post up funny/stupid/headshake stuff, my volume of posting will decrease. Hopefully this means a more concentrated product, but as always, there's no guarantees here.

Keep clicking, but get out there and enjoy your own life this summer.